i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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