i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
my poor anus
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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