So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I'm both gender and math confused
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
