Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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