I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
