So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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