chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
it glows. i had to have it.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
