Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
