It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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