You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
