Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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