he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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