This is not my ceiling
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
