I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
