Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I want to stick my p in your. b.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
