My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
My vagina just recognized that song.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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