seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
