You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
