i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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