I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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