How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize