Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
