Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
