Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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