Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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