hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
