we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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