I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
