How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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