my sisters under your porch take her home
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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