Just fell off a train. Bad.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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