she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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