All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize
