I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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