I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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