take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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