I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
