Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
FUCK WHALES
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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