just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
