Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
i now understand why vodka
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
