I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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