You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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