I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
My bed smells like the plague
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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