It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
