Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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