NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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