he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
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He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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