There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
