My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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