i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
