well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
