How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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